me:
so mum is going to be 47 in two weeks...
grandmere:
oh my god, I've got a nearly-50 year old daughter!
me:
don't let her hear you say that! she'll get upset!
grandmere:
SHE'LL get upset? how the hell do you think I feel, I'm nearly 80!
her:
oh, I'm sick of all these stupid cooking shows!
me:
what?
her:
*pointing at an ad on the side of the bus* the Hunger Games! They're getting more ridiculous as they go on!
me:
yeah. in this one they probably just have to kill each other off to win
her:
I wouldn't be surprised, lovie!
*grandmere is trying to cheer me up*
grandmere:
oh, but you are hot!
me:
no. not even a little bit
grandmere:
oh. then you're cool!
me:
not even close
grandmere:
okay. you're tepid then.
me:
sure
*2 minutes later*
grandmere:
close the gate please
me:
I can't, my hands are full... wait a minute
*closes gate with foot*
me:
WHO'S TEPID NOW, BITCHES?!